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I first created an OKCupid account in 2011, and for nearly five years, online dating and I had a tumultuous, on-and-off relationship.

Then, in December of 2015, I decided I would take a break from online dating—and that unlike my previous "breaks," this one would last for more than a few weeks.

I’ve always been open about my first and longest relationship, when I dated someone who was dealing with severe depression.

I’ve written about how his depression affected me, and even about how it affected him.

But people had relationships before dating apps existed and—surprise! It took a little while, but when I was putting less energy into scoping out prospects on dating apps, I had more time for parties, spontaneous encounters, and other ways to meet people.


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